Wednesday, July 5, 2017

A WHOLE NEW INSECURITY.....

HI, ALL,

Hope everyone enjoyed the extended holiday weekend. I am sure many of you managed to squeeze in a bit of writing between the hotdogs, hamburgers, potato salad, beer, pop, chocolate chip cookies, ice-cream, and fireworks!

I was fortunate enough to enjoy an incredible brunch with a few new friends who are just amazing. They really made my weekend! Even in my middle age years, I am still able to make friends... how awesome is that?

Well, today is the first Wednesday of the month and most of us all know that it's time for another installment of the IWSG, the phenomenal global group formed my the incredible Alex J. Cavanaugh. If you'd like to join and vent your insecurities ... hop over there now and sign up. 

I am thrilled how this group has grown in only a few short years. I remember so clearly when Alex mentioned he'd be starting this group and asked for us to post. It was a whirlwind and it still is today. Imagine venting once a month. Clearing out the cobwebs of our minds and receiving such heart felt advice and support from our fellow writers who are or have experienced the same ups and downs in their writing journeys. But it's not just about writing, it's about life, too.

As most of you know I have had a rough time for the past few months. I want to thank all of you for you cyber hugs, vibes, love, prayers, and your endless support. It means so much to me. I actually wrote my first piece in ages for the WEP and won the Encouragement award badge for INVISIBLE BRIDGES... If you have a chance to read it, scroll down to my previous post. It's a quick read.

Now on for a different kind of insecurity this month. First, I am THRILLED to say my offer was accepted for my new digs... After three months and over 150 showings, I found my next home. Yes, another LOFT in Printer's row. This time in the Franklin Building. Another historic printing house from 1916-1984. The building is classic Chicago Prairie style. Think Frank Lloyd Wright. This is a rather small space (only 650 sq. ft.), BUT it has five 5x7 ft. windows streaming in SE light. That was the selling point for me. 

I have another rehab, of course, but this one isn't nearly as bad as my last. I learned so much from the last one, so I know what NOT to do this time. LOl

SO now I have approx. one month to six weeks to pull this place together. The insecurities are running wild. Did I do the right thing? Will it be big enough? Will I plan the space correctly to accommodate all my needs.... just to name a few.

So life is at FULL SPEED ahead again whether I like it or not. All I can do is take each new challenge one day at a time...

I also want to say how much I enjoyed visiting everyone these last few weeks. It felt great to reconnect! I'll be dropping in on you throughout the day today, and hopefully on Friday. 

Until then, stay SAFE and always BE AWARE of you surroundings...

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

JOURNEY THROUGH THE CROSSROADS OF LIFE...INVISIBLE BRIDGES...

Hi, All,



Welcome to the WEP Bloghop. Today the featured prompt is Bridges...

Certainly leaves a lot to the imagination, don't you think? The possibilities are endless. 

Leave it to my dear friends Denise Covey and Yolanda Renee to post Nilanjana Bose's wonderful idea. 

As for the badge, isn't it simply beautiful... thank you Olga Godim for creating it for the challenge.

I am sure you will enjoy all the entries in the HOP today. As for mine, well, it's been a while since I wrote anything, but this prompt spoke to me. 

As we all journey through life, there are many obstacles in our way and at some point we have to choose which "bridge" to cross. I hope you enjoy...



INVISIBLE BRIDGES


Many, if not all of our journeys in life, lead us to an invisible bridge. 


A mist of silver haze clings to a sketchy outline. Moving shadows play hide and seek on the other side.  

Do I cross? 

Or—go back to the safety of the road just traveled?

Droplets of sweat leak down my face as I watch the images before me. Every fiber of my being screams, TURN BACK.

My throat constricts. I close my eyes, but only for a brief moment. 

Breathe…just keep breathing.

Something fizzles.

I spin around. Swallowed by pitch, the road I had just traveled no longer exists.

Echoes of an eerie silence weave like delicate threads shrouding me.

A loud pop… 

Pinpoints of light flicker, then ignite. 

A network of lines brand the midnight canvas set before me. Within seconds another bridge appears. This one clear and glowing like hot embers. Somehow this one is more terrifying… 

It leads nowhere.

A choice must be made, but to what avail?

Is my mind playing tricks on me?  Is it real? 

How could it not be? 

This is my destiny. How often has this happened to me? Once, twice, a dozen? A hundred times? 

Chills freeze and burn within me. I tear myself away from the bright lights and inhale as much as my lungs will allow. I cough out an acrid and unpleasant scent. One that I have never experienced before—not a hint of floral, grass, woods, or sea, but some type of chemical. The bile bites hard at the back of my throat and I cough again.

I strain to focus on the blurry lines of the invisible bridge. The mist lingers like a haunting ghostly shadow at the base. Now the swirls of silver are mixed with reflecting prisms of colors seducing me to make a move…

A warm, yet icy breeze, ruffles my hair. With my first step a gust pushes me toward the edge. I loose my footing and plunge into the depths of the mist, stumbling onto what seemed to be a clapboard bridge. A transparent railing breaks my fall as a splint of wood pierces my hand. Droplets of blood trickle and disappear into the billowing mist.

Can this be my payment for crossing?

Is this real or a fantasy? 

A fog horn blares in the distance and echoes like a ghoul playing a musical saw. 

I stand tall and take a few more steps. The mist clears as if an unseen hand swept it away. A dim phosphorescent light peeks over the low lying hill miles from the water’s edge. My boot heels thump on the clapboards as I continue along the bridge. Step after step the view remains the same. Hours later, I travel no further.

“What gives!,” I cry out and drop to my knees.

Over the deadly silence a whisper reaches my ears. I can’t comprehend the words. Another whisper, but this one is a fraction louder. Then another. And another… 

I am breathing heavier now. With each new chant the words becomes clearer. It seems to go on forever. 

Then, I hear the final whisper.

“The journey you take is a difficult one, my Son. This is but one of many bridges you will encounter. Take heart. Your inner strength will get you through them…

“Remember to always…keep your faith.”

I spring to life, my breath escapes me. “It was just a dream…it was just a dream,” I tell myself over and over. 

I sink back down into the sweat soaked sheets.

Or was it?


Thank you for joining me today. I hope you get a chance to read some of the other entries. Just click on the WEP link. Have a wonderful day everyone!



Thursday, June 15, 2017

A NEW BEGINNING....

Hi, All,

I just wanted to THANK all of YOU for your wonderful, kind, and supportive comments on my last post. As many of you know it has been a very trying and emotionally troubling few months for me. Each day is getting better. Although still stressed with life, I am managing to finally pop around the blogosphere and actually write a NEW PIECE for the WEP blog hop.

If any of you are in a slump and want to have fun writing something new just for YOU, why not join the hop...

Here are all the details....

"Write…Edit…Publish (WEP) is a permanent bloghop posting every second month. Check out our program for 2017 in our sidebar and Pages above. We usually post three times between bloghops–winners’ announcements, guest posts and up-coming bloghops. Submit your name to the InLinkz list to join us each challenge. WEP challenges are free, open to all. If your entry catches our eye, you will win a $10 Amazon Gift Card or a winners’ badge."

It is hosted by my two dearest blogger friends, Denise Covey, and Yolanda Renee... these two woman are amazing. They find time to host this blog hop and keep us all from falling into a slump if we need an inspiration and a place for others to read our submissions....

There is still plenty of time to sign up... WE post our submissions on June 21st. or Earlier if you like. And it doesn't just have to be writing, it can be photography too! 

I've missed the hop and haven't done it a long while. I am so looking forward to everyone's submissions. 

My submission is called INVISIBLE BRIDGES and I hope you will pop back here when I post it next week.

Thank you again for all your love and support! Sending you all a GREAT BIG BEAR HUG!









Wednesday, June 7, 2017

REJECTIONS....REJECTIONS....REJECTIONS....

Hi, All,

I hope you are all well and happy. Summer is upon us. YAY, blue skies sunshine and warm breezes. After a FULL month of daily rain, we finally dried out and for the past week or so the weather has been simply beautiful.

Today is another segment of the IWSG. Thanks to Alex, we all get to have a monthly rant about the industry we all love and hate. 

Sorry I missed last month's IWSG post. I was too bummed and depressed to deal with anything...life can be so overwhelming at times.

I know each and everyone of us has had their share of rejections, but this particular one hit me hard.

Which brings me to this month's question.... Did you ever say, I quit? 

In mid April I had won a twitter pitch hosted by the KNIGHT AGENCY. The agent loved my pitch and requested a query and the first three chapters. For A MONTH I held my breath waiting....waiting....waiting. 

It was an extremely stressful time for me. One of my dearest friends, Melissa Bradley, had been admitted to hospice. I was heartbroken. We spoke several times and she seemed happy and at peace. She refused to give up. 

Still in Florida, I had planned to visit Melissa the moment I returned back to Chicago the first week of May. I was too late. She passed away on April 30th and I was floored. There is not a day that goes by that I don't think of her. WE had planned to collaborate on a new story once I returned. We were both so excited about the prospect.

She was so thrilled that I had won the pitch. She couldn't wait for me to tell her I landed my first agent. Two weeks after she left I received the REJECTION letter.

Although not a form letter, it shook me to the core. NOT AGAIN! I shopped this story for over four years and it had multiple requests for full by many top agents. But, once again, I was REJECTED. 

I fell into a deep depression. First because of the loss of a very dear and amazing friend. And then this... How does one bounce back from such a shock to their heart?

I was/am ready to quit. I haven't written anything new in years except for the editing and blurb writing I do for our community. I have absolutely no desire to write for myself.

I hope to one day, but as of now writing eludes me. I can't focus on anything but my work for clients, taking care of my precocious pup, and trying to find a new place to live... ONCE AGAIN. That is another story....

Now for the second part of this month's question...For those of you who have quit... what brought you back? I would REALLY like to know. I hope to find some answers as I pop around to your blogs later today and tomorrow.

I certainly know what Melissa would say to me.... "Get a grip! Suck it up and just  _ing do it..." I'm smiling as I see her saying it to me. 

ANYWAY.... enough of this GLOOM and DOOM..... It's a gorgeous day in Chicago and I have a busy afternoon looking at another five condos....This will make 100 in the past month. A new record for me and my realtor! At least I'll be breaking a record today! LOL.

I hope all of you are doing GREAT!!!! I miss you terribly and hope to be myself soon. It's time....

HUGS....




Wednesday, April 5, 2017

INSECURITES OF ANOTHER KIND....

Hi All,

Surprisingly, it is the first Wednesday in APRIL... Can you believe a third of the year is gone already? What happened?

LIFE...

I've been doing a lot of soul searching and praying lately. A dear friend of ours in the blogging community has entered hospice care. Melissa Bradley, a funny, loving, and very opinionated woman is battling for her life. Cancer. Such a horrific disease that has touched us all.

So this is why my insecurities this month are more focused on LIFE than on worrying about writing. Although writing is in our soul, we still must deal with all of LIFE'S pains as well as its beauty.

So today, I would just like to leave you with two requests. First, PLEASE keep Melissa in your prayers and send your love to her on FACEBOOK. I know she posted yesterday, so she is on line from time to time.

And second, TELL and SHOW the people you love that you appreciate them and that they are an important part of YOUR LIFE... They need to know. Many times we ignore our loved ones for writing that next scene, or editing your first, second, or fiftieth draft. Let them know...

I'd also like to thank Alex, the creator of our monthly hop, for posting about Melissa at his blog today. WE ALL APPRECIATE what you do for us Alex... Thank you!

Here is the link to the other members of our group. Perhaps you can give some advice, cheer someone up, or even feel better KNOWING you are not alone in your insecurities about LIFE...

HUGS to you ALL! 

Sunday, April 2, 2017

NEWS ABOUT A FELLOW BLOGGER AND FRIEND....

Dear Friends,


It saddens me to write this to all of you, but our dear friend and fellow blogger, Melissa Bradley has entered hospice care.

As many of you know, Melissa has been battling with cancer for the past several years. I spoke with her today and I asked if she'd like me to write to all of you.

This is the hardest post I have ever had to write. Please send prayers and love her way. Leave comments. Contact her directly if you can on Facebook. She will try to be on Facebook at some point, but she is weak and in pain.

We all have lost loved one to this dreaded disease, me included, and I know the power of prayer in helping to relieve the pain and suffering...even just a little.

Melissa has always brought so much laughter into my life and to the life of others. Her spunky spirit and zest for life will never be gone. It will live on through our memories.

I hope and pray for a miracle, that this disease melts away, and Melissa will once again be laughing with us. She has, and always will have, a special place in my heart, and her spirit will always be part of me.

I LOVE you Melissa. Please stay here with us.

Thank you, everyone...


Wednesday, March 1, 2017

INSECURITIES....YOU BET! IT'S MARCH ALREADY!

Hi, All,

Sorry I missed last month's post, but time just slipped away from me...

Once again we are meeting for the IWSG where we get to vent or give advice to our blogger friends.

This year so far has had me very tense and anxious. Already it's March 1 and I feel like I'm still in limbo. I had high hopes at the end of the year for a few projects I was working on that had looked very promising, but sadly neither on panned out. Sigh.

I know we've all been there, but it seems like I've been spinning my wheels and going nowhere forever...

Most of my demise is from my living space. After I sold the loft, I moved into a high rise. Thought it had it all, but the my place sits right on the train tracks. I knew it when I signed lease, but I hadn't realized the trains clank every two minutes from 4am to 2am. For only two hours a day I get a reprieve. So once I get back I'll have to move again. I've been in my tiny condo in Orlando since Christmas. I had looked forward to spending my days writing on my balcony. As many of you know I've searched in Florida for almost two years before I found a place. Well, bad choice again...

The people who live here are mostly renters and trash the place like crazy. Although the maintenance crew is excellent, the trash still piles up all over. Ugh. I am a visual creature and waking up to trash when I walk Hamlet is not the way I'd like to start my day.

It has also been unbearably hot. Mostly mid 80's and humid.... normally the temps in central Florida for the winter months are cool in the low 60's during the day and upper 40's at night. There have only been three or four days with temps below 75.

So to keep things short, I am on the hunt again... which sadly leave me very little time to write. Between editing an amazing novella and running all over central Florida, I have no time. It saddens me that I have no time to blog either. I am in bed by 10:30 most nights these days...which is so not me...

Okay... pity party OVER....

My editing work brings me great joy because I am working with an amazing writer who is growing in leaps and bounds. I humbled that I am helping someone else hone their craft through my suggestions. So even though I am not writing for me I am writing, creating atmosphere, pace, and economy of words. That excites me and perhaps when I am done, I will have the motivation to carry on with my Film Noir story that I had started ions ago.

SO... for all you writers out there, like me, feeling trapped in life and feeling like nothing is happening in your life.... helping others achieve their goals and dreams will certainly put a smile on your day...

Big hugs to ALL and THANKS to ALEX, for letting us vent and support one another on the first Wednesday of every month....

Don't forget to visit the other members for inspiration and to help those of us who have anxieties this month..... Visit Alex Cavanaugh's list here.

I will HONESTLY try my best to get around and visit you all very, very soon....